How To Eat For Free, Forever (In 24 easy steps)

by | Apr 25, 2014 | Food Reviews

late_night_jack-fireplace

 

I outfoxed that circle-headed Jack N The Box and figured out a way to eat for free, forever.

This entire ruse is built on @GoldPeakTea (which, btw, is as good as industrial Ice-T gets).  I take about 5 to the face each week.  Participating JNTB’s are selling 44 oz of that elixir for only a dollar.  That’s love.  And if that’s not enough, enterprising fast food fiends like you and me can turn that dollar into two free tacos, literally, ad nauseam.

Every JNTB receipt invites you to take a phone survey.  Your reward?  You guessed it, two tacos for that fast-food fix.  And as one in perpetual pursuit of the come-up,  I wondered, could I game this system?

I had 4 valid receipts that met the 3 day purchase window.
Each purchase was a dollar. How long would it take me to run through 4 consecutive phone surveys and claim my 8 tacos? Were they going to stop me? You’re about to find out!

 

read'em and weep.

read’em and weep.

  1. Survey 1: TRT 3:00 I ran through the entire gauntlet of questions and was given a redemption code.
  2. Survey 2: TRT 1:27 After inputting general receipt data, I answered one question and was shuttled to the end and given a redemption code.
  3. Survey 3: TRT :50s Only input general data and then given code
  4. Survey 4: : TRT 45s ditto
Total Run(s) TIme

Total Run(s) TIme

Now, I just have to find someone with the intestinal fortitude that wants to eat these pieces of shits.

Playdate: Chuck E Cheese’s

by | Apr 24, 2014 | Play Date

 

You can’t front. Before the home gaming systems explosion of the late 80’s, Chuck E Cheese restaurants were the lick. Tempest was my joint. Centipede, my jam.

Launched by Atari founder, Nolan Bushnell, in 1977 the chains 500 restaurants have seen brighter days.  As it turns out, switching Chuck’s swag from hip hop to rock had their dough looking like their dough.

Chuck lost...weight, a hockey jersey and street-cred.

Chuck lost…weight, a hockey jersey and street-cred.

 

This past Saturday I was sitting on some left-over tokens from a b-day party earlier this month.  So I rounded up Maya & Joaquin @ 8:45 am,   determined to be the first in line to squeeze life from this 8-bit reliquary.

Chuck E Cheese is fashioned after old-time Vegas casinos: alternative currency, absence of clocks, robo-tainment and disgusting food. But it remains a great place to keep  kids occupied.  Always the concerned Father, I established two inviolable rules:

  1. We leave as soon as we run out of tokens.
  2. Don’t put your mouth on anything, especially the pizza.   CEC has always been more petri dish than deep dish.

 

holding a half-hour in my hand.

holding a half-hour in my hand.

Gimme the loot! Gimme the loot!

Gimme the loot! Gimme the loot!

Score!

Score!

Beep. Buzz. Bam.

Alashazam.

22 minutes later,  we were ghost! And 45 minutes later, Joaquin asleep.