..and that’s not even the funniest part.

I also told Bristol Palin, “I love you, Mommy.” 

And if that’s enough to make you wince and wonder, I read, no, I WROTE Bristol’s diary entries.

What in the actual fuck am I talking about? 

Some of the homies on Facebook know because they were there, too. My buddy Rick Kleinsmith got a postcard autographed for his aunt. My buddy Brad Thomas became the unofficial Mayor of Wasilla. My buddy JustinandAmy De Nino knew the highways, er, highway, like the back of his hand. And my buddy Neil Gallegos-Rodríguez put me in touch with his buddy XXXX who hooked us up with the vegetation when we landed. My buddy Matt Lutz piloted the plane. 

So, what in the actual fuck am I talking about? 

Bruh, we produced Bristol Palin’s Lifetime reality series, Life’s A Tripp at the Pain compound in Alaska and then in LA, in a mansion with her sister, Willow. 

The opening sequence of the show involved Bristol picking up a phone and talking to Tripp. We recreated the moment, and I played Tripp on the other line–in order to make it feel ‘real,’ of course. After faking a 15 second conversation, I decided to end the call by impersonating Tripp. 

“I love you, Mommy.” 

I watched her reaction on tape on repeat with a barrel of laughs. 

So, at the end of every episode, America’s most despised teen mom opened her journal and reflected on the episode’s events. I wrote those because, you know, I can tap into single mom vibes like that. I couldn’t find a clip of an episode’s ending, so this will have to suffice.

The series lasted a solitary season. I learned enough about the Palin’s to write a widely ignored book, but I thought I’d drop this post instead.

Speaking of books, working on the show required me reading both Bristol and Levi’s books. 

No pain, no gain.

Life’s a tripp.